HunDuddle Hussy

1. special thanks to my daddy for saving my life and editing this entire thing for me after my computer must have caught the stomach bug that i had for three days.

2. ignore my ghostly mcghoster face in the beginning. it goes away.

3. my "assistant" was the lovely mia.

huge megafied contest with ms. mle designs.

2010-11-13T16:55:00.000-08:00

this is rad.

can i just say that first?

i was asked to help participate in an amazing giveaway

hosted ms. mle designs

that will allow you an opportunity to possibly win $500

in products from ms. mle designs.

listen to ellen degeneres for the rules on how to participate.

oh.

and pay no mind to the camera adding 72 lbs to my hussy self.

the buff arms part? that's for real.

awww yea.

go be a fan of ms. mle designs on her facebook page.

and go to her website for more details on the contest.

don't forget to check out her freakin awesome scarves while you're there!

they may soon be yours!!

i got interviewed. me.

2010-10-26T06:14:00.000-07:00

uhh. yea. me. i got interviewed.

can you believe that?

me either.

valerie from mompetitors sat down with me.

and got a nice taste of her dirty grocery store feet.

i like doing that to people.

but in my defense, i think she likes taking it too.

it would be hard to believe that you've never heard of her.

but if you live on a different planet,

go check her out.

and spread the word of her awesomeness.

this particular video is my favorite.

thanks valerie!

total eclipse of the friends.

2010-10-12T11:58:00.000-07:00

just a little random awkwardness to commemorate the people i miss.

before you can completely understand the randomness of this video,

you must first pay tribute to the great

bonnie tyler's

total eclipse of the heart video.

Total Eclipse of the Friends from Jessica Lowe on Vimeo.

he gun cut hisself - real life replay.

2010-06-08T20:40:00.000-07:00

this seriously happened to me at chick-fil-a recently,

when i gave my 8 month old a plastic knife.

for real.

plastic.

adam lambert is annoying.

2010-05-08T06:54:00.000-07:00

not that it has anything to do with adam lambert being a weirdo whiny in his songs,

but

lately my kids do nothing but whine.

(i guess that does have a little something in common with adam lamert.)

what do they want from me!?!?

summer is near, you can hear it in their screams.

(ps...i suck at using premier elements but i promise you, practice makes perfect, be patient with me!)

credit where credit is due:

idea for mime mixed with stupid adam lambert song

was brought to you by Lover :)

if only you could see HIM do it...

bread belly

2010-04-22T12:13:00.000-07:00

one time us girls had a belly showing extravaganza.

we wanted to enjoy the jiggly goodness that comes from birthing children.

michele named my belly a bread belly.

today we made the bread belly come to life.

spray tan for a chubby girl

2010-04-13T12:02:00.000-07:00

lots of people always ask me how a spray tan works.

here it is.

please ignore my back fat.

and my saggy pancake boobies.

and my thick thighs.

and my poofy "bread" belly.

and my double chin.

and my cottage cheese bum.

and my butt dimples.

and my gay tramp stamp.

and my non makeup face.

well...

everything.

guest vlogger - cleo

2010-04-12T07:14:00.000-07:00

i'm back from vacay and while i'm busy editing my spray tan video,

(to take out all the nasty fat shots)

here is my newest, lovliest, hussiest, guest vlogger hard at work.

introducing: cleo

can't see it?

go here.

wanna guest vlog?

click on that little button over there on the right and follow the instructions.

i can't wait to see you in action!

mothers rockin' out

2010-03-30T08:49:00.000-07:00

motherly mothers can shake it too.

watch us.

i thought about editing this but then got lazy.

every single second is just too good to lose.

informercial for motherskin blankets

2010-03-24T00:01:00.000-07:00

after being annoyed because gus needed my hand on his head at all times or he would be upset, i decided there needed to be such a thing as motherskin blankets.
lindsay decided an infomercial would be an appropriate way to promote our product.

my favorite parts of this video are:
our outfits.
lover unwillingly allowed us to play dress up in his pants.
and
go jenny!

extra large toilet paper for extra large...

2010-03-22T09:15:00.000-07:00

just strolling through walmart and i came across this fabulous find.

charmin's got nuthin on this roll.

movie tribute - nacho libre, song to ramses

2010-03-18T00:01:00.000-07:00

more nacho.

movie tribute - nacho libre, encarnacion

2010-03-15T00:01:00.000-07:00

prolly one of the best movies of all time.

actually no, scratch that.

~the~

best movie of all time.

gia wouldn't let me borrow her 'fro to play the part

so i made due with what i have.

i'm gonna start saving for a wig collection.

donations?

lover chinhead

2010-03-09T00:01:00.000-08:00

you may have already seen it on youtube, but per someone's request,

it's havin' it's debut on the vlog.

wait don't leave,

one more thing!

i have an e-bff who just started a new blog and she needs some hookers to follow her.

just go check her out here.

support fellow bloggers everywhere.

dead dolphin, enough said.

2010-03-08T00:01:00.000-08:00

the kids went on their usual exploring adventure this weekend.

but this time they found more than just rocks and cigarette butts.

too bad dolphins can't fit in little boy pockets.

are u gross like me and u have to see closeup shots?

go here.

news flash!

go here to be a part of history. i'm not kidding.

you must click that link or die.

the big hussified announcement

2010-03-05T00:01:00.000-08:00

in all it's glory,

allow me to present...

vomit crotch

2010-03-04T00:01:00.000-08:00

i look forward to the day i won't grace my friends with the presense of vomit smell.

until then, i'll just deal with it.

guest vlogger - shaunaaaaaaaa

2010-03-03T00:01:00.000-08:00

i'm inviting all my readers to send me good vlogs.

you might just be featured one day, like kris was.

or miss shaunaaaaaa here.

(what's the story behind all the a's shauna?)

if you're having issues seeing my guest vlogger's vids,

go here for shaunaaaaaa's

here for kris's.

meat in my draws (texas slang for drawers)

2010-03-02T11:57:00.000-08:00

don't look at my muffin top.

a message from miah chinhead

2010-03-01T20:27:00.000-08:00

i'd like you to meet miah chinhead.

he has a special message for you about tomorrow, which is today.

all lover, all the time. all hotness.

2010-03-01T00:01:00.000-08:00

three things:

lover's public announcement

lover being hunduddle with the chapstick

lover's wanna-be of moi

all in one fantastic video.

enjoy.

pizza and tears

2010-02-26T10:18:00.000-08:00

just a little randomness from this morning.

fyi, when i drive and video i am not turning around as much as my camera makes you dizzy.

and

i'm only driving for the first teeeeeeny segment of this one.

the rest of the time we're parked at miah's school waiting until it's time to go inside.

so chill.

wanna-be, tenley from the bachelor

2010-02-26T00:01:00.000-08:00

i couldn't leave her out after the women tell all.

just too easy.

thankfully i still own my first cinderella dress.

i thought it would be appropriate.

rotten sweetarts. eww.

2010-02-25T13:34:00.000-08:00

this kinda stuff only happens to me.

wanna-be, michele the vegetarian

2010-02-25T00:01:00.000-08:00

i've said this before and i'll say it again,

vegetarian's are all liars.

you know when it's late, and they're hungry and no one is looking,

they're shoving cheeseburgers and chicken legs in their face.

i don't trust those vegetarians.

lover is pissed

2010-02-24T12:55:00.000-08:00

remember how i said i wouldn't always have makeup on

or hair did?

this is one of those time.

don't be scared, it's me, it's just me.

featuring: Lover :)

a video response from kris

2010-02-24T05:25:00.000-08:00

i don't need alllll the spotlight alllll the time.

just like kris 'hearts' miley,

i 'heart' well made video responses.

tricks with a baby

2010-02-24T00:01:00.000-08:00

uhmm.

i don't condone trying this.

especially if you lack a tiny tuxedo and faux hawk.

a trip to tejas - random awkwardness

2010-02-23T17:04:00.000-08:00

this was a few weeks back.

but i thought i'd share as a tuesday bonus.

no biggie.

kris 'hearts' miley

2010-02-23T04:14:00.000-08:00

betcha didn't know this 'bout kris.

wait.

betcha don't know kris.

period.

a play by play on my burnt grease face

2010-02-22T11:24:00.000-08:00

drama unfolded at my house.

i realized that my kids will never, ever, never take me serisouly.

wanna-be - the over-excited bride, i.e. my sister amy

2010-02-22T00:01:00.000-08:00

ok uhmm, no joke.

my sister busted out with all these moves

at her reception to this very song, i kid you not.

it was hot.

own it sister. own it.

wanna-be - vienna from the bachelor

2010-02-19T00:01:00.000-08:00

and the grand finale to my bachelor saga week.

enjoy...

Dear Lover, A Confession

2010-02-18T11:53:00.001-08:00

wanna-be - ali from the bachelor

2010-02-18T00:01:00.000-08:00

wanna-be - gia from the bachelor

2010-02-17T10:58:00.000-08:00

i'm dedicating the rest of this week to the bachelor girls.

to build up for vienna, ya know?

http://

a backflip for over 1600 hits in one day!

2010-02-17T00:01:00.000-08:00

i told amber i'd do a backflip if i got 1000 hits on the blog in the first day.

i don't go back on my word.

although my back and neck wishes i would have.

(sorry for the sunlight screwing up the view)

vienna is in the making

2010-02-16T16:15:00.000-08:00

a short public anouncement.

obvisouly a little late. as of now, 199 fans.

rock on.

wanna-be - my dad

2010-02-15T18:07:00.000-08:00

i'll be remaking all of my famous wanna-be's as well as adding plenty of new ones. here's an oldie but goodie of my dad rockin out to coldplay. i thought it was appropriate for my receding hairline to be in full view given the subject i'm impersonating.

stripper hair

2010-02-09T09:19:00.000-08:00

a blog stalker of mine named, amy's wedding jess, got me started on calling my nasty, too long, needs to be trimmed hair "stripper hair".

it seems to have caught on and i felt it deserved a tribute song.